A Mind Ruled by Emotions
by TheBoltShapedScar
Summary: Lucius and Bellatrix discusses betrayal and loyalty. A mind ruled by emotions vs. one ruled by logic and cunning. What is hidden in those minds? Which thoughts will come to the surface when you're mad from anger or frightened by your own cousin? What do y


**A Mind Ruled by Emotions**

**Summary: **Lucius and Bellatrix discusses betrayal and loyalty. A mind ruled by emotions vs. one ruled by logic and cunning. What is hidden in those minds? Which thoughts will come to the surface when you're mad from anger or frightened by your own cousin? What do you do when you don't understand yourself?

**Disclaimer:** Nope, I still don't own any of these characters. I'd love to, though…

**A/N:** Bella's thoughts in italic are meant to be some voice in her head, which is her mad part. Therefore the italics are all meant to sound hysteric and a lot of them very sarcastic. Now you're aware of that; let's go on with the story.

"You're so naive, Bella."

"What do you mean, Lucius?" She looked at him, puzzled and angry. _Don't_ _you ever call me that again! You would never have dared when we were children. Shame I don't own the same authority. Tel me WHY!_

"You believe in the Dark Lord," he said. As if it made all clear.

Shock, confusion and anger seared through her body. _Because I…_ _What the hell do you mean? Don't make me seem less clever than you. Please treat your cousin well, my dear, or you'll regret it!_

"And don't you?" Fighting hard to keep herself from roaring with anger. Lucius didn't back an inch.

"I believe in power," he said simply.

Suddenly her anger left her, and she sank to the floor, feeling shallow and betrayed. _No! He didn't just say that! He's my cousin, dear little Lucifer who had always done what was the best for him! Lucifer, the name I gave him when we played as children._

"Why?" she asked. Her voice trembling. He turned back to her.

"I didn't mean to shock you, Bella." His voice almost kind. She would never have guessed that he could speak like that.

"What was the purpose then?"

"To open your eyes."

And before she could do anything he had disapparated.

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She sat still for a while, just thinking. She had always thought that Lucius followed their master because of what he believed in, because of what he was raised to believe in. If the mudblood-lovers got power, would he then betray them? She realized that he had actually done it once. When the Dark Lord lost to Harry Potter that night in Godric's Hollow, Lucius had pretended to be under the imperius. She rose from the floor and screamed to the ceiling at the thought. She felt the hatred and loyalty, the pain she had suffered in Azkaban. And she remembered the greatness of their master. He, who had recently raised from the dead. He, who had gained frightening followers as the dementors. He, who had been kind and forgiving to the traitors. And this was how Lucius paid him!

"Betrayer," she whispered. Her voice filled with poison and madness. The anger took control of her body. She was the only one who knew. The only one who could do something.

She arrived at the Malfoy Manor a few seconds later. A houseelf let her in and told Lucius that she had come.

"Let her in."

The door slammed. "Why did you come?" he said. His voice was cool as usual. "I thought we finished our conversation."

_Oh no we haven't, my poor little cousin who doesn't seem to understand a thing. It isn't nice, is it? Not to understand! _

She shook her head, firming the grip of her wand, which she had hidden beneath her cloak. He raised an eyebrow and looked at her. Cool. Interrogating. Wondering. But in some way open. He wanted her to tell. And so she did. She ran towards his desk, pointing her wand at his throat.

"Hands on the desk," she hissed. He did what he was told to. He looked frightened, and she smiled. A broad, wicked, mad smile. It was very rare she got the chance to see her dear cousin frightened. _Oh yes, Lucius, I'm your very dangerous and frightening cousin who have come after you. Want to play hide and seek? No? I thought so. Then give some answers, my boy._

"Bella! What are you doing?"

"Don't you dare," she whispered. "Don't you dare to call me that, you… You filthy bastard who wants to betray him!" He had called her Bella! As if they actually _were_ playing hide and seek. _That's bad, Lucius, very bad. Please behave and do as you're told to!_

He seemed confused to her. _He's playing tricks to you, Bella. He knows what you're talking about. Don't believe him. Don't believe him again, ever!_

"I do not plan to betray anyone, except if you count the mudblood-lovers!" A little bit of his usual arrogant self sneaking into his voice.

"Oh yes you do. I thought you were clever, Lucius. But luckily you told me of your betrayal. I hope you don't usually do so? Telling your victims what you're about to do?"

And then he understood. "If you would please stop pointing that wand on me, I will explain everything. I am _not_ a traitor."

She hesitated. "Prove it."

"Come on, Bellatrix. Put the wand away. I'll keep my hands on the desk, and if I don't, you'll be able to threaten me far quicker than I'll get my wand. Deal?"

She nodded slowly. _Don't trick me. I'm the master of wands, here. I'm the one asking. Just answer the best you can, and I won't do you any harm. Come on!_

"You see, I don't want to betray our dear Lord," he said. "I admit that I'm with him because of power, yes, but that doesn't mean that I want to join Dumbledore's crew. Could I get power there? No! They wouldn't trust me. In my current position I have the power to kill mudbloods. I've got a good position, I've got lots of money. There's simply no point in changing side."

"Again. Changing side again, you mean." _Filthy betrayer! Lucifer is the right name for such a devil._

"Bella," he protested. "It's not relevant."

"Oh, I see. It isn't relevant that you're capable of betrayal. Why, my dear Lucius, isn't it relevant?"

"First; I wouldn't be able to change. No one would believe me. Second; if the Dark Lord lost enough power for me to change, he would most likely be dead, or at have so little power left that the Death Eaters wouldn't stick together anyway. Third; last time I thought our master was dead. I know you didn't," he added, as he saw she was about to protest, "but I did. Therefore there was no reason to stay loyal to him. Now I know that he's immortal in some way. I know that it would be foolish to betray him, when not being sure, whether he was dead or not. I've learned my lesson, Bella."

She finally seemed to be convinced. _That seems to be fair. But he hasn't explained everything._

"I see. But why am I naive because I believe in him? And why did you want to open my eyes?" She sneered when saying the last words. Those words had hurt her more than he knew.

"I think it's naïve to believe so much in anything that you don't question it. If the Dark Lord told both of us to jump out from a cliff – let's say 20 metres to the ground and no magic – you would do it, because you believed in him. And I wouldn't because I don't. Not that much, anyway. On the other hand, I believe in some of the same things regarding mudbloods."

She nodded. "And why did you want to open my eyes?" She wanted the full explanation. She had to be sure that he wouldn't betray them. _Yeah, come tell me my dear cousin. Convince me. I won't bite you, so just calm down boy. Tell your dear old Bella the truth. Come on puppy!_

He sighed. He had known it would come to this, but truth was that he didn't know. But he knew that she wouldn't believe him if he said so. He had to explain in some way.

"I just don't think it's good for anyone to believe that deeply in anything. I think it's important to open ones eyes, and well, you're my cousin and fellow Death Eater, you mean something to me." He shrugged.

She sent him a disbelieving look. "An act of mercy? I see. You've got to say more Lucius. Won't buy that one. Not without a proof." _Is he a traitor after all? No, don't think so. But he's soft, weak. Got to keep an eye on him. He might change. Poor little Lucifer! Lost your mind? That's bad for the little bad-boy. Oh yes, got to keep an eye on him. Please tell me. Tell me something more! I've got to know._ She smiled madly at him, requested him to go on without speaking a single word aloud.

He saw the madness in her eyes and found it scary. He would have to come up with an explanation. An explanation that didn't include mercy and caretaking. An explanation her mind would understand. A mind so different from his own. A mind ruled by emotions.

"I think it's good if people like us who are close to the Dark Lord have got the wits and bravery to stand up against him if necessary. Usually, he makes the right decisions, of course, but us who are mighty enough have got to look critically on what he says. If there's just a little thing we want changed, we've got the power to tell him so, and because of that, we have to know that he's human too. He _can_ make mistakes.

_That's not right, my dear, he's perfect! But if you think so… Don't worry, Bella will accept what you've told. You're free now. I put my wand away, see?_ _Now it's hidden beneath my cloak._ She nodded. "I guess I'll see you soon then?"

"I believe so," he said. His voice didn't show the faintest sign of relief. Only coolness, arrogance and meticulousness.

She was about to walk away when he called her back. "Bella?"

_What now? I thought we were finished! And don't sound like that. I'd rather have your cool attitude than this weak, friendly one._ "Yes?"

He shook his head. "Nothing. Go!"

_What did you want to tell me? I can deal with that sugary voice of yours, if you just tell me_. "As you wish." She disapparated.

In a cold room on the Malfoy Manor sat the head of the family. Staring at the spot from which she had disapparated and wondered what he had wanted to tell her. It had been a brief feeling, just as when he told her to open her eyes. He didn't know whether he liked it, but he was sure that he didn't know it. "A mind so different from my own," he muttered. "A mind ruled by emotions. A _person_ ruled by emotions. A person so different from myself, and though so alike." It was a person whose spirit touched his curiosity. "I'll find out! I'll find out what I wanted to tell her!"

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**A/N:** This is partly made to investigate Bella's two sides. The mad one, and the one which isn't. Do you think she's parted like that too? Please give me your opinion!

This fic is kind of open. I can make one (or a few) chapter(s) more if you want me too, or it can stop here. Please let me know what's the best for the story!


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